Having two

Having two baby boys is... well, it's different from having one! Some days are better than others at this point. As a perfectionist at heart who has read everything I could read about raising babies, it's hard for me to juggle both boys. When I am caring for one, I'm feeling guilty about what I'm not doing with the other one.

On top of the boys, there is the house. Now that I'm not pregnant anymore (whoohoo!) I have a lot more energy and I want to do things like clean and cook and all that stuff. But you can't really do that when half of the day is spent nursing. The past couple of days have been a lot better, mostly because I've learned that I simply have to change the way I think. At church on Sunday they were talking about how a baby was born, and everything changed. (Thank God for that!) Obviously, they were talking about Jesus, but it made me realize that everything has to change in my home, too. I'm used to putting Isaac to bed and then relaxing the rest of the evening. For years I have enjoyed my evenings. I get everything done when I get home so that by 8:00, I can relax and watch TV. But that doesn't work anymore, and that's OK. Everything has changed. So now I have come to accept that a load of laundry will need to be done everyday. The dishwasher will need to be run daily as well. When Isaac goes to bed it's time to straighten the house. I know that everybody says the dishes and laundry can wait, but that just sounds good in theory. The fact is, I like wearing clean clothes and eating off clean dishes!

It has helped as well that I am rethinking my expectations of Jared. I want him to be sleeping in his crib and nursing on a schedule, but the fact is, he's a 6 week old baby that was born 3 weeks early. It's going to take some time and I need to enjoy this period where all he wants to do is be held. Soon enough he'll be running around with Isaac and we'll have a whole new set of worries!

Overall I love having two boys! There are so many sweet, precious moments. They definitely outweigh the hard times. Our family feels like a Family now. I know my two sons were given to me as a gift from God and I love them both so much.

That's it for now, I'm going to go help Isaac sort some colored Rotini while Jared naps with Daddy. Oh wait, has Isaac's diaper been changed? I should check that first....